Blame Cannada

Not handy

People who have known me for years wouldn’t make the mistake of asking me to anything handy.

Well, my wife does, but she doesn’t really ask. She tells me to do handy stuff—then fusses at me for messing it up. I believe the word for this is “marriage.”

Bogey golf

I love to golf, but I’m terrible.”

This is the warning I give anytime someone asks me to go play a round.

It’s a completely serious warning, too. I couldn’t be worse at this sport. It’s one of the most enjoyable warm weather activities, but one of the most difficult to master.

Not going back

I feel as though I need to follow up on last week’s column by giving you an update on where I am as a sports fan.

I am not currently a sports fan.

That’s the update.

In fact, I have renounced all sports on several occasions since last Monday. Some hurts just go too deep. Some wounds simply won’t heal.

So close

To quote the great Russell Casse from one of my favorite films (Independence Day):

“I been sayin’ it!”

“I’ve been sayin’ it for 10 *dang* years. Ain’t I been sayin’ it? Huh? Yeah, I’ve been sayin’ it.”

North Carolina is winning the 2016 national championship. Go ahead and take that information to Vegas.


Well there you have it, college basketball fans.

Was that enough madness for you?

If Northern Iowa buzzer beaters and Middle Tennessee beatdowns didn’t get you going, I don’t know what will. If that Wisconsin shot to beat Xavier didn’t get you off your couch, you might want to check your pulse.


You almost got us, CBS!

You had the perfect plan. There was information we, the viewers, wanted, and you were going to take your sweet time (two hours) giving it to us.

I’m talking, of course, about the annual NCAA selection show, which was supposed to last from 5:30-7:30 p.m. on Sunday.

The right champion

Colonial Life Arena was about as loud as it could get without the Gamecocks actually being there last Saturday night.

As the final seconds ticked off the clock in the Class AAAA state championship final between Byrnes and Irmo, the fans, the coaches and the players let out a loud roar symbolizing several years of hard work.


The Greer Citizen

317 Trade Street Greer, SC 29651

P.O. Box 70 Greer, SC 29652

Phone: 1-864-877-2076

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